Oki Doki TokiDoki!

Oh Barbie! Let's face it many try to be her and many try to date her. She's served as a fantasy for many men and women whether they want to be her or be with her, and many have climbed to the C-Grade ranks of fame trying to impersonating her.

The Paris Hilton doll, a cheap wannabe knock off  of Barbie. To think the real life version wasn't cheap or plastic coated enough!

I loved Barbie as a kid, I tried to collect as many of the Barbie sets with her theme of pink and purple luxury pools, sofas and dressing tables. Plus, I would try and get as much outfits for her every week and as many colour shoes. It was amazing and I loved dressing her up. She was all plastic fun, but she has an appeal whether you hate or love her.
I have nothing against Barbie. Even though she was originally created for little girls to play dress up with, she has affected adults lives more than kids. Not only 'cos those kids grow up with Barbie as part of their childhoods, she does knock deep nerves of what our world creates on ideals and even if she wasn't in the picture, creating ideals is a human fault not a plastic toy's.

Try putting a striped midrif on this bad girl ;)

Anyway, Barbie is fun and so is all her merchandise. Now, there is a new Barbie on the block called Tokidoki Barbie. She was created by Simone Legno for the famous Japanese brand TokiDoki.

Also, TokiDoki Barbie has tattoos! She's pretty hot and I like her pink hair. Best thing of all, she isn't actually aimed at kids this time. Her inked little body, sultry stare and cheesy fashion is indeed aimed at adults. She comes at a steep price too and she has a pet dog covered in cactus suit called Bastardino (perhaps an Italian cross breed?). Clearly Barbs has gone all hardcore. As she is aimed at all lovers of pop culture, I think this one definitely reflects our tacky wannabe celeb culture rather than trying to set any standards...cos clearly her standards have dropped as you can see by her outfit and styling.

"I'm just gonna walk this little bastard(-ino) right into hell with me fuggerz!"

Well now that this new version of Barbs is out, we can only wait for Ken. I wonder what his tramp stamps will be about or his fashion, 'cos let's face it...Ken has always had shitty style and outfits. Poor guy...

No wonder Barbie refuses to marry you Ken! The decades just have not served you justice.

What about prince charming?

There are so much colouring books and merchandise on the Disney princesses but the Disney princes don't appear anywhwere. I flipped through Disney Princesses activity book whole waiting in the check out line at Checkers one day, you see Princesses Ariel, Jasmine, Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty (whose evil step mother used to be my fave as kid!) and Belle/Beauty and the beast chick.

Who said big sleeves and big hair were out?

Sadly they didn't include Nala the lion who hooked up with 'ol Simba. Simba was the Lion King of Africa, literally, but he was actually a good looking lion. Now before you think I'm into beastiality or something shit stupid like that, you have to admit he was a handsome lion. Most of those characters are based on their voice actors' faces so they do have anthropomorphic qualities amidst their hairy mugs. To be honest, Simba looked like a hot surfer dude, all anti-meat and killing of animals as he lived the 'alternative lifestyle' with that meerkat and warthog on the outskirts of the sahara. Let's face it, Simba's mane looks like a well maintained coif.

I just can't wait to be king.......

I think this guy has a likeness of what Simba could have looked like if he was human. This guy was not Simba's voice, it was actually Matthew Broderick. 
Most of the Disney Princes have all looked polished, buff and completely dumb. By dumb I mean they are not able to talk at all. Technically they are Ken dolls....nothing but an accessory.

Although, I won't lie Aladdin kind of broke your average prince charming by being the first non-white knight in shining armour. Plus, in his story he doesn't save the princess but she saves him as she becomes the sugar mommy and makes him rich. I thought Aladdin was good looking, and to be honest he does look like he could typically belong anywhere between Rylands and Grassy Park in Cape Town....you know the kind who drives his Citi Golf every Thursday to Galaxy and on Saturdays to Camps Bay and to the city to vang on kak.